It looks good..the last bit sort of reminded me of Anakin v. Obi Wan, though.
The last bit is a piece of a much earlier peace done as I left the clan and posted in SoP before Drake-tar deleted the forums. And, to be fair, it's **** near impossible to write a convincing Master vs. Padawan fight without sounding like Anakin and Obi-Wan... I tried several different ways and it all came the same way, especially in the context of the story (Grim leaving the Jedi Order to join a Sith Order)... Honestly, if I could have made it different, made it not sound like that, I would have.
EDIT: I tried re-writing that piece, so hopefully it's a little less Revenge of the Sith. Since it was never posted in this forum no one can really know what was said but me, so I can change it at will, lol.
